Beauty, Health

How to Get Cancer and Other Diseases


Seems like nearly every conversation I have with  a person who is not equally committed to eating healthy and avoiding toxins ends the same way: they throw up their hands and say, “Everything causes cancer!” or this one, “We’re all gonna die of something!” 

I want to avoid getting cancer and ideally, I’d die in my sleep after a long and healthy life. How great would it be to not be that one person in eight who ends up battling cancer? Wouldn’t it be lovely to enter into old age without aches and pains and various ailments that require a host of pills?

I mean, I don’t drive my car without my seat belt thinking, “I’m going to die anyway! Might as well  be reckless!”

If you are the person who laughs and thinks health conscious people (me) are crazy, this is for you.

How to Get Cancer and Maybe Even Other Diseases Like Heart Disease and Diabetes!

1. Overeat

Did you know that obesity contributes to breast, colon, and esophagus cancers? And the gallbladder and pancreas too. Throw another steak on the grill and don’t trim the fat!

2. Forget about vitamin D

There’s a connection  between low levels of vitamin D and certain cancers. There are foods that contain vitamin D and your body makes it when you spend about fifteen minutes in the sun. But since you don’t care, stay inside and eat junk food. Preferably on the couch, smoking a cigarette eating packaged cookies. Which leads me to…

3. Pile on the Processed Foods/Cookies/Crackers

Basically consume foods that come in boxes, cans and bags. Processed foods cause cancer and other health problems, plus there is a lack of nutritional value in them and they are made from chemicals. Another Pringle?

4. Drink your Diet Soda

When something is sugar free, rest assured there is a chemical replacing that sugar and that chemical comes with the cancer warning. Don’t care? Keep drinking your soda because artificial colors also cause cancer.

5. Don’t eat fruits or vegetables

You are missing out on important nutrients as well as fiber. A lack of nutrients is related to cancer and other ailments.

6. Eat more hot dogs/deli meats/bacon

This is related to number 3 but deserves its own category because hot dogs are known to be cancer causing thanks to cancer causing nitrites.

7. Pass the Donuts

What’s wrong with donuts? They are made with such good ingredients as white flour, sugar, and hydrogenated oils AND THEN FRIED! Don’t you want a dozen all to yourself? And cancer just loves sugar, in fact it thrives on it.

8. Don’t Worry about GMO’s

GMOs and the chemicals used to grow them have been shown to cause rapid tumor growth. Sounds good to me! (not)

9. Consume Refined Sugars

Sugar makes your insulin levels raise quickly and also makes cancer grow! Cancer loves high fructose corn syrup and sugar so go ahead and eat cake, pies, cookies, sodas, juice, sauce, salad dressings, muffins and donuts.

10. Be sure to get your Hydrogenated Oils

Since you don’t care about your diet and healthy eating, you won’t mind hydrogenated oils. This is found in a lot of processed foods. Hydrogenated oils ” alter the structure and flexibility of cell membranes throughout the body, which can lead to a host of debilitating diseases such as cancer.” Find this in jars of peanut butter, cookies, packaged foods, among other things.



And since you’re going to die anyway, you might not be concerned  about the “lifestyle” cancers which are up by 40%. Smoking, drinking, laying in the sun, lack of physical activity, not brushing your teeth. Yes you read that correctly- not brushing teeth can cause gum disease which can contribute to cancer.

Of course, there are the toxins in personal care products which add up when you consider the average woman comes in contact with 515 synthetic ingredients everyday. Think about all of the ingredients that make up your daily beauty routine: toothpaste, deodorant, shampoo, hair gel, mousse, hairspray, soap, shower gel, shaving gel, skin cream, eye cream, moisturizer on the body, sunscreen, nail polish, foundation, concealer, mascara, eye shadow, blush, lipstick – even baby shampoo and baby bubble bath! Add in household cleaners and you have some strong hormone altering chemicals floating around the cells in your body.

But who cares, right? It couldn’t happen to you!

The chance of you getting breast cancer is one in eight. Your risk of colon cancer is one in twenty. Ovarian cancer is up- one out of every fifty women will get it as opposed to one out of every seventy a few years ago.

I’ll end my article with this quote: ” We don’t know the cause of most cancer, but experts believe that about 10% of most cancer types are due to inherited gene changes. Cancer that does not appear to be caused by inherited genes is called “sporadic cancer.” It is believed that most – perhaps 90% – of all cancers are sporadic. This means even if cancer does not run in a family, a family member can still be at risk for some type of cancer in his or her lifetime.”




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2 thoughts on “How to Get Cancer and Other Diseases

  1. What a title! You make some excellent points, Cindy. Thank you for spreading this vital information. Let’s hope people will listen before their bodies start getting sick. Xo

  2. The ones who refuse to see the writing on the wall are the ones who will drain the health care system with many self-inflicted chronic diseases. When I’m confronted with such ignorance I’d love to be able to say, Seriously? Are you really THAT clueless, THAT uninterested?…..REALLY?
    Sadly, this great post will not likely be read by those who would benefit the most. Huge shame!

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